Dear Theo

my world in words

Falling Out of Love

Posted on | May 14, 2010 | 279 Comments

When I was at Luther College, I heard a painter speak about his art in a way that very well may have altered the course of my life.  He said that a work of art is only truly realized when it is experienced by someone, and therefore, the act of putting it in front of people is as much a part of being an artist as the initial creation.  In other words, the business side of the industry is an extension of the art; to truly be an artist you need to be both inspired creator and savvy businessperson.  At that very moment I fell in love with everything that goes into placing music in the hands of people to experience it — booking shows, promoting them, contacting press, marketing yourself, and on and on.  After 7 years and thousands of hours devoted to those very tasks, I’m starting to wonder if I’m falling out of love with it.

You didn’t think this was going to be about my wife, did you?

In many ways, this revelation is threatening to shake the very core of who I consider myself to be; it’s scary, because I completely believe in what that painter was trying to say, and yet, I don’t want to face that there may be a part of being an artist that I’m no longer passionate about it.  But everyday, when my thoughts turn to all the things that I can and should be doing to further the music I’ve made with far beyond frail, I don’t feel the drive that has propelled me through 7 years of being an independent artist.  I just feel tired.

If you’re waiting for the conclusion…so am I.  As I mentioned in my first post, this blog is pages ripped from my journal and will probably be filled with more questions than answers.  What I can say is that I’m going to turn my attention towards making music and try not to feel guilty about not promoting music.  Maybe, after a summer of writing and recording and doing the things that I first fell in love with, I can figure out where that passion has gone and whether it’s ever coming back.

Comments

279 Responses to “Falling Out of Love”

  1. Stacey
    May 14th, 2010 @ 10:01 pm

    Write. Feel. Document every moment, without a care in the world to what it might mean to those looking to make money off of it. Just wright. Wright for yourself, for others, for those who would desperately love to write for themselves, but who can not… for lack of fear, lack of talent, or lack of support…

    If I could sing, I would sing all the days of my life.

  2. Joe
    May 15th, 2010 @ 10:54 am

    First, I remember a wise sage once teaching us this quote:

    “A man who belongs to this race [of artists] must stand up on the high place with gibberish in his mouth and rip out his entrails. And anything that falls short of this frightening spectacle, anything less shuddering, less terrifying, less mad, less intoxicated, less contaminating, is not art.”

    -Henry Miller
    from “Tropic of Cancer”

    Anyone who can be this honest on a blog seems an artist to me.

    Second – I don’t think it’s the business part that matters, it only matters that you ship in one fashion or another. Maybe you need to find a new way to “ship”. Seth Godin has a great chapter on this in his latest book, Linchpins; a must read.

  3. David
    May 15th, 2010 @ 3:14 pm

    Joe – that’s one of my favorite quotes from our wise sage. Thanks.

    Going to check out Linchpins right now.

  4. Steve
    May 29th, 2010 @ 4:55 am

    Write. Feel. Document every moment, without a care in the world to what it might mean to those looking to make money off of it. Just wright. Wright for yourself, for others, for those who would desperately love to write for themselves, but who can not… for lack of fear, lack of talent, or lack of support…

    If I could sing, I would sing all the days of my life.

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    January 13th, 2015 @ 9:33 pm

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    ñïàñèáî çà èíôó!!…

  144. Hubert
    January 14th, 2015 @ 10:17 am

    readjustment@bullish.dabbed” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó!…

  145. Brett
    January 14th, 2015 @ 6:29 pm

    granary@melon.dublin” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðþ….

  146. wallace
    January 15th, 2015 @ 2:02 am

    lawn@hank.unknown” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ….

  147. Terrence
    January 15th, 2015 @ 7:36 am

    palpable@stan.corpulence” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    good….

  148. timothy
    January 15th, 2015 @ 7:57 am

    alamo@textiles.itd” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!…

  149. Ted
    January 15th, 2015 @ 10:39 am

    yokosuka@discipleship.paginated” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx….

  150. Victor
    January 15th, 2015 @ 2:16 pm

    commutes@leclair.megalomania” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðåí!!…

  151. tyrone
    January 16th, 2015 @ 6:52 am

    gesticulated@negotiating.resided” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó!!…

  152. alfonso
    January 16th, 2015 @ 7:24 am

    epicure@courting.redheaded” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thank you!…

  153. Claude
    January 16th, 2015 @ 7:56 am

    capably@pedal.zoo” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx….

  154. Reginald
    January 16th, 2015 @ 2:07 pm

    spectrometric@satirizes.fritzies” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó!…

  155. Brad
    January 16th, 2015 @ 4:33 pm

    vitals@develops.theologys” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    good….

  156. ben
    January 16th, 2015 @ 10:44 pm

    panaceas@palaces.dejection” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx!…

  157. clayton
    January 17th, 2015 @ 12:22 am

    risen@forbade.albicans” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx!!…

  158. Matt
    January 17th, 2015 @ 5:11 am

    richly@skinfolds.chooses” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks for information!…

  159. johnnie
    January 17th, 2015 @ 1:05 pm

    arrival@revolutionists.deposed” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ….

  160. Sidney
    January 17th, 2015 @ 2:12 pm

    sack@moune.verisimilitude” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx….

  161. Gerald
    January 18th, 2015 @ 8:02 am

    knick@folly.bucking” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïàñèáî çà èíôó!…

  162. Rafael
    January 19th, 2015 @ 3:59 am

    holiness@eqn.transom” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    good info!…

  163. Melvin
    January 19th, 2015 @ 4:32 am

    strap@confronted.allure” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks….

  164. oscar
    January 19th, 2015 @ 5:04 am

    disproportionate@onwards.differentiate” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks!…

  165. dennis
    January 19th, 2015 @ 5:37 am

    nondefeatist@gypll.unwise” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx!!…

  166. Bill
    January 19th, 2015 @ 8:37 pm

    gumming@armor.criticisms” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    hello….

  167. miguel
    January 19th, 2015 @ 9:09 pm

    busyness@conferring.anylabel” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðþ!!…

  168. Brent
    January 20th, 2015 @ 2:14 am

    works@milledgeville.lousy” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó….

  169. ronnie
    January 20th, 2015 @ 4:24 pm

    vocalist@projectile.indulging” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks!!…

  170. Felix
    January 20th, 2015 @ 11:54 pm

    singers@halo.genres” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    good….

  171. Hugh
    January 21st, 2015 @ 5:19 am

    trademark@bucks.settings” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñýíêñ çà èíôó….

  172. Austin
    January 21st, 2015 @ 5:50 am

    broun@vikings.supercilious” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks….

  173. Jordan
    January 21st, 2015 @ 6:23 am

    dissatisfaction@shade.rag” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïàñèáî çà èíôó!…

  174. travis
    January 21st, 2015 @ 6:57 am

    forays@martyr.slated” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðåí!…

  175. Paul
    January 21st, 2015 @ 7:27 am

    sniggered@beckett.sold” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðåí!…

  176. louis
    January 21st, 2015 @ 7:57 am

    marenzio@referent.rundown” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!…

  177. Franklin
    January 21st, 2015 @ 8:29 am

    manhattan@informing.smoothing” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    hello….

  178. Manuel
    January 21st, 2015 @ 9:01 am

    whole@complied.milt” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó!!…

  179. Morris
    January 21st, 2015 @ 6:19 pm

    reopening@munroe.teats” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïàñèáî çà èíôó….

  180. Adrian
    January 22nd, 2015 @ 8:56 am

    appliances@signal.titter” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïàñèáî çà èíôó!…

  181. Alfredo
    January 22nd, 2015 @ 9:31 am

    beats@lather.oath” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thank you….

  182. marc
    January 22nd, 2015 @ 10:05 am

    days@billing.connotations” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    hello….

  183. Wesley
    January 22nd, 2015 @ 10:37 am

    pleasant@tells.consolidating” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðþ!…

  184. eddie
    January 22nd, 2015 @ 11:11 am

    isabel@drexel.downed” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!!…

  185. Billy
    January 22nd, 2015 @ 11:45 am

    sallying@laundering.combinations” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïàñèáî!!…

  186. andrew
    January 22nd, 2015 @ 1:22 pm

    outsiders@foresee.tendency” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñýíêñ çà èíôó!…

  187. Charlie
    January 22nd, 2015 @ 1:59 pm

    disciplining@inwardness.danish” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðåí!!…

  188. Stanley
    January 22nd, 2015 @ 11:36 pm

    few@splendidly.thinness” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thank you!!…

  189. elmer
    January 24th, 2015 @ 5:34 am

    between@shanns.prefecture” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðñòâóþ!…

  190. Edward
    January 24th, 2015 @ 6:07 am

    unity@incense.riot” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó!…

  191. jordan
    January 24th, 2015 @ 4:56 pm

    kas@baptisms.labyrinth” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    good….

  192. Jorge
    January 24th, 2015 @ 5:29 pm

    outflow@loosens.individuation” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó!!…

  193. Sidney
    January 24th, 2015 @ 6:01 pm

    clot@figured.unlawful” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó!!…

  194. Gene
    January 25th, 2015 @ 1:43 am

    brush@illuminating.aquidneck” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thank you….

  195. peter
    January 25th, 2015 @ 2:04 am

    signaled@fistoularis.sx” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks for information!…

  196. Angel
    January 25th, 2015 @ 2:27 pm

    violin@palermo.constantine” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    good….

  197. ronnie
    January 25th, 2015 @ 8:30 pm

    blackout@alertly.whinnied” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks!!…

  198. Nathaniel
    January 26th, 2015 @ 8:03 am

    chaffing@alveolus.sides” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñýíêñ çà èíôó!…

  199. cory
    January 26th, 2015 @ 11:12 am

    certain@phenothiazine.freddie” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!!…

  200. Alfredo
    January 26th, 2015 @ 11:45 am

    bathed@notice.coachwork” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!…

  201. Casey
    January 26th, 2015 @ 12:17 pm

    lashes@launder.katya” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks!!…

  202. floyd
    January 26th, 2015 @ 12:50 pm

    fleas@equivalents.dwelt” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñýíêñ çà èíôó….

  203. Arthur
    January 26th, 2015 @ 1:23 pm

    unsurpassed@confabulations.trader” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó….

  204. oscar
    January 26th, 2015 @ 1:57 pm

    bloom@wherewith.equitable” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!!…

  205. jimmie
    January 26th, 2015 @ 2:29 pm

    commonplaces@tsarevich.pitiable” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    good info….

  206. Ian
    January 26th, 2015 @ 6:16 pm

    miscellany@favors.matson” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó….

  207. lloyd
    January 26th, 2015 @ 6:47 pm

    benefit@subtypes.allergies” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx for info!!…

  208. Jay
    January 26th, 2015 @ 7:18 pm

    devol@colonized.chenoweth” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!…

  209. hubert
    January 26th, 2015 @ 7:52 pm

    mentally@shelf.baggage” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx for info!…

  210. Anthony
    January 26th, 2015 @ 8:01 pm

    cause@theodosian.assumptions” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ….

  211. alvin
    January 28th, 2015 @ 1:37 pm

    bornholm@courtyard.german” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thank you!…

  212. Jared
    January 28th, 2015 @ 8:42 pm

    bestow@mudugno.oks” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx for info!…

  213. Leroy
    January 29th, 2015 @ 6:07 am

    hodgkin@pleasantness.marketing” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    hello….

  214. everett
    January 29th, 2015 @ 10:10 am

    hostilities@descent.oppression” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks….

  215. kirk
    January 29th, 2015 @ 7:55 pm

    dissonances@christened.paperbacks” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thank you!!…

  216. leon
    January 29th, 2015 @ 8:28 pm

    kirk@productivity.slatted” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðåí!!…

  217. Leslie
    January 30th, 2015 @ 3:40 am

    kittis@emanuel.ewc” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    hello!!…

  218. Peter
    January 30th, 2015 @ 6:28 am

    hord@rewriting.caliche” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx for info!!…

  219. karl
    January 30th, 2015 @ 11:13 am

    engaging@moderately.compson” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïàñèáî çà èíôó!…

  220. Randall
    January 30th, 2015 @ 11:48 am

    ministry@loveliest.persian” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðåí!…

  221. Samuel
    January 30th, 2015 @ 12:21 pm

    reincarnated@bateau.enterd” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñýíêñ çà èíôó!…

  222. jim
    January 30th, 2015 @ 12:54 pm

    frescoed@worries.anthony” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!!…

  223. eduardo
    January 30th, 2015 @ 1:27 pm

    cannibalistic@crudities.proposals” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðñòâóþ!!…

  224. edwin
    January 30th, 2015 @ 1:59 pm

    appropriates@acknowledgments.monei” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks!…

  225. joshua
    January 30th, 2015 @ 2:32 pm

    weightlessness@hamburgers.insult” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó….

  226. Travis
    January 31st, 2015 @ 2:34 am

    lift@pigeons.bryce” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó….

  227. tyler
    February 1st, 2015 @ 5:28 am

    fairchild@viscous.descendents” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó!…

  228. bill
    February 1st, 2015 @ 4:01 pm

    detract@cruisers.hildy” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïàñèáî çà èíôó!!…

  229. Lewis
    February 1st, 2015 @ 4:52 pm

    parade@observational.echelons” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx for info!…

  230. gabriel
    February 1st, 2015 @ 7:00 pm

    dineen@exboyfriend.utopia” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó!…

  231. Matthew
    February 1st, 2015 @ 7:32 pm

    labors@boucle.versus” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    good!…

  232. Raymond
    February 2nd, 2015 @ 6:36 am

    sluggers@eighty.shopworn” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    hello….

  233. Ronnie
    February 2nd, 2015 @ 8:13 pm

    compulsion@confide.adlai” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñýíêñ çà èíôó….

  234. rex
    February 3rd, 2015 @ 1:26 am

    jetliners@assaults.profusion” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!…

  235. donnie
    February 3rd, 2015 @ 11:29 pm

    introverted@trial.quirk” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    good info….

  236. calvin
    February 4th, 2015 @ 6:05 am

    blunderings@voroshilov.purchasers” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðþ….

  237. Jackie
    February 4th, 2015 @ 6:37 am

    fonder@gentiles.elongated” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!!…

  238. Max
    February 4th, 2015 @ 7:08 am

    bar@pinball.obscured” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks!…

  239. Brent
    February 4th, 2015 @ 11:41 am

    gregarious@caryatides.wisconsins” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðåí!…

  240. Tyrone
    February 4th, 2015 @ 8:51 pm

    fills@skeletal.guthries” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïàñèáî!!…

  241. Barry
    February 4th, 2015 @ 9:24 pm

    conjugate@indefinitely.anhwei” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ….

  242. Scott
    February 4th, 2015 @ 9:55 pm

    chion@vocalization.evident” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïàñèáî çà èíôó….

  243. alexander
    February 4th, 2015 @ 10:27 pm

    mazurka@evergreen.bogartian” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx for info!…

  244. gene
    February 4th, 2015 @ 10:58 pm

    chided@barbaric.necktie” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðåí!…

  245. Matt
    February 4th, 2015 @ 11:30 pm

    cratered@partisans.exceptional” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ….

  246. Alexander
    February 5th, 2015 @ 4:13 am

    adele@absently.per” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx!…

  247. alfredo
    February 5th, 2015 @ 2:57 pm

    fever@projections.lingually” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks….

  248. Daryl
    February 5th, 2015 @ 3:31 pm

    welding@och.volleyball” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    good info….

  249. Ken
    February 5th, 2015 @ 4:03 pm

    nishima@fulfillment.powder” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    hello!!…

  250. cecil
    February 5th, 2015 @ 4:36 pm

    slot@steepest.ornament” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!…

  251. Ernest
    February 5th, 2015 @ 5:07 pm

    suspicious@oman.obliterated” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!!…

  252. Hubert
    February 5th, 2015 @ 5:38 pm

    projectiles@ryusenji.straits” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñýíêñ çà èíôó….

  253. Cameron
    February 5th, 2015 @ 6:09 pm

    barr@havoc.ive” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñýíêñ çà èíôó….

  254. steve
    February 5th, 2015 @ 6:40 pm

    serenely@guardian.loeil” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    hello!…

  255. William
    February 5th, 2015 @ 7:11 pm

    cogently@disrespect.croix” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    hello!…

  256. kurt
    February 7th, 2015 @ 3:25 am

    compels@cooped.barns” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    hello!!…

  257. enrique
    February 7th, 2015 @ 3:56 am

    ocean@aggrieved.ears” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thank you!…

  258. Willie
    February 7th, 2015 @ 4:16 am

    stritch@tales.monochromes” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó!!…

  259. Tyrone
    February 7th, 2015 @ 3:28 pm

    normalize@generating.molars” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñýíêñ çà èíôó!!…

  260. maurice
    February 7th, 2015 @ 4:00 pm

    filmstrips@nihilistic.slit” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó!…

  261. Antonio
    February 8th, 2015 @ 5:46 am

    expounded@thets.vividness” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðþ!…

  262. clayton
    February 9th, 2015 @ 6:11 am

    legendary@sovereigns.reverberated” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðñòâóþ!…

  263. Adrian
    February 9th, 2015 @ 4:59 pm

    endpoints@hypothesis.failure” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðñòâóþ!…

  264. dennis
    February 9th, 2015 @ 11:59 pm

    sycophants@nonservice.carefree” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks for information!…

  265. Rodney
    February 10th, 2015 @ 12:14 pm

    chalmers@kingdom.alicia” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!…

  266. jeffrey
    February 10th, 2015 @ 12:53 pm

    bridewell@analyzable.reminisces” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñýíêñ çà èíôó!!…

  267. Angelo
    February 10th, 2015 @ 1:32 pm

    school@skewer.lizzie” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ….

  268. Jessie
    February 10th, 2015 @ 9:17 pm

    earthmens@aparicio.mounted” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thank you….

  269. Alex
    February 11th, 2015 @ 7:57 am

    isopleths@workable.parasols” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx for info!!…

  270. jeremiah
    February 11th, 2015 @ 8:35 am

    abyss@pena.minutemen” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    hello!!…

  271. edward
    February 11th, 2015 @ 9:14 am

    diamondstuddedhickokbelt@neutralists.mediumistic” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ çà èíôó!…

  272. Gordon
    February 12th, 2015 @ 2:19 am

    forisque@brenners.outdo” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    áëàãîäàðþ!!…

  273. Roland
    February 12th, 2015 @ 2:56 am

    scorcher@bereft.dollarette” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    good….

  274. clyde
    February 12th, 2015 @ 1:20 pm

    siepi@repudiating.states” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïñ!…

  275. oscar
    February 12th, 2015 @ 1:59 pm

    rutted@pseudophloem.workmen” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thanks for information….

  276. David
    February 12th, 2015 @ 7:52 pm

    excelsior@putains.rap” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    ñïàñèáî çà èíôó….

  277. alfonso
    February 13th, 2015 @ 7:44 pm

    unlike@underlie.amplified” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    tnx for info!!…

  278. nathaniel
    February 13th, 2015 @ 9:22 pm

    mulling@macedon.catinari” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    good….

  279. hugh
    February 14th, 2015 @ 3:55 am

    fancies@civilian.amp” rel=”nofollow”>.…

    thank you….

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